Sunday, April 26, 2009

A fetish!

So, I was in lovely La Conner with lovely Steinunn and her lovely babies...all in all a good time, save for the eatery we chose, which was slow, but at least the food was gross and the staff were surly. After that harrowing experience, we decided to head out in search of their famed tulips (which are gorgeous) but, being prudent, decided to stop for a "bio-break" first.
I went first, and upon enter the public restroom I heard a woman talking to her son, who were in the other stall. This is what I heard "C'mon, push out all the little piggies, that's it. Get all those piggies out. Are you done? Are all the piggies out? Yeah? No more piggies? Okay, clamp down now. Good job!" Then some chatter from the boy that I couldn't quite make out, that lead to this reply "Yes. Well, penises are bathroom talk. So, it is okay to talk about them when you are in the bathroom but we don't talk about penises outside the bathroom okay?" Then, another inaudible part, followed by "No, she doesn't. Penises are only for boys. Not girls. Only boys use penises."
Wow. Well done Madam. That is gonna be one messed up little, gay, pig loving kid. Never, ever take him to a farm. Or feed him bacon.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Edumacational, and true

This list is rad...and you just learned a few new words! Good job. Now, go use these words and impress the pants off people.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

A great idea!

And it is the Husbands' idea! Let's do it! Well, I won't, as I lack them...but YOU should!

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Laughably sad

PETA, I just want you to know that no one is going to forget about you. It's okay. You can take a day off. I mean, sure, people will still eat tasty, tasty meat, but it's not your fault. You can stop with the wacky stunts. Clearly you needed someone to tell you it was okay to stop, that we heard you, that we get it. It is. We did. We do. So, enough with the porn ads, and enough of foolishness like this, okay?
Everything is gonna be okay...take a nap, have a tofurkey tog (see, I didn't even use the word's okay).

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Friday, April 10, 2009

My sick brain

So, here is a random stroke of randomness. I have the flu (whee), as does the husband (double whee)...but he is lucky enough to be a "sick sleeper" whereas I am not so much. So, this morning, I woke up, despite feeling like a crap sandwich, at 7:45. Yay. What is a girl to do? So I finished the "book" I was reading, and then the agony in my back (stupid, hateful bed of evil and darkness) forced me to get up. Watching crappy tv was fun yesterday, but I felt like something a hair more ambitious, that still involved me sitting on the couch, in a blanket, with a heating pad on, so I downloaded Peggle...ohhhh Peggle, thou art a cruel and exacting Mistress...
I played for 4 hours before Husband awoke...and I thought perhaps it would entertaining and marginally cathartic to share everything I thought about while getting to level 10-5 (yeah, 10-5, that's right). Lest someone, (who actually still reads this broke-down blog) gets offended, this list is in NO particular all.

*Lincoln City
*ice cream bars
*High School
*clawfoot tubs
*Jon Stewart
*Stephen Colbert
*my parents
*The Outsiders
*Commonwealth Games
*Gone with the Wind
*4th of July
*roast beef
*The cast of NND, esp. Kathleen, James and Cindy
*The Sims 3
AND...Godfather 2, the game

Wow, that is a lot of things to think about. No wonder I can't remember why I walk into rooms at times...

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